I have a dream: the phone goes and it’s the brand new taoiseach on the line. “I’d like you to head up a new Ministry for Women,” she says. “Can you start Monday?” Do puppies chew Jimmy Choos? You betcha.

The first thing I’d do would be to ban all media features on the theme of the benefits of recession – if I see one more I’ll scream. They usually kick off with a list of what’s not chic anymore – from owning this year’s car to being on the waiting list for a Hermès handbag – before moving on to the fun you can have shopping in cut-price chain stores.

But hang on a minute. What about the skilled global workforce that has laboured to meet our demand for the best money can buy, delivering clothes and accessories designed to be heirlooms as opposed to ‘wear them three times and then throwaway’? Should they eat cake? (Incidentally, in that workforce I do not include those who allegedly rear crocodiles for must-have handbags – that topic belongs to a different rant.)

Feel fabulous
Where clothes are concerned, I’m firmly in favour of the long-term investment. There’s a lot more to be gained from shelling out for the best than merely impressing your peers. If you don’t believe me, try on some couture. There is an indescribable pleasure in wearing a garment that’s been designed by a master and hand stitched by an expert – feel the fabulous fit, the way it caresses the body; take in the exquisite finish; and think of the pleasure your granddaughter will have when she wears it in a few decades’ time.

I’m not talking about the stuff that shimmies down the Paris/New York/Milan/London catwalks and sells for a king’s ransom, but the ready-to-wear ranges made by the top fashion houses. I defy you to find pants that flatter the bottom better than those made by Emporio Armani, travel clothes more practical than those from YSL Rive Gauche, or anything calculated to make you stand out in a crowd more than the fantasies dreamed up by Issey Miyake.

Timeless
If those are outside your budget, take a gander at Joseph. Year after year he comes up with clothes that are simple, timeless but, somehow, just right. Yes, buying the best is expensive but, let’s face it, most of us buy far too much – better a couple of good garments every season than a handful of cheapos destined to end up in the recycling bin.

Come autumn, I’m reliably informed that the hottest look will be cashmere leggings from Harvey Nichols. Right now leggings are a splendid example of people power. I understand M&S are selling one pair a minute. Having got us all into skinny trousers, the fashion industry then did its best to persuade us to dump them for wide-leg pants, which admittedly look great (provided you have hips that would look good on a kipper).

Go skinny
But we like our skinny pants; by day we can wear them under dresses that otherwise would shriek mutton-dressed-as-lamb too short and, by night, they look great worn with a simple, silk T-shirt and a vintage satin blazer.

Leggings take the skinny-legged concept and run with it. There was a time when they were strictly for youngsters, but not any more. They are comfy, forgiving and flattering to legs that are feeling the years – whether that means mottled skin, varicose veins or a plain lack of muscle tone. I’m wearing a pair right now bought in the early 1990s, the first time they appeared outside a gym. Stitched by Issey Miyake’s skilled seamstress, I reckon they’ll still look good 20 years down the line.

One word of advice though; stick to black and leave the wet-look and sequinned examples to the kids. If you have anything but superb posture, wear them with heels. (Have you noticed how 60-somethings in ballerina pumps seem to shuffle?)

Whatever you buy, do yourself a big favour; buy the best you can afford. Once acquired, I guarantee it’s a habit you’ll keep for life.